It Starts with a Single Spark…

During the past several weeks, I have been trying to get back into habit of writing even if it is by use of pen and paper. Yes, the old way of writing that some of us use to do in school to pass the time. Most of what I was written has been short pieces or even scenes of bigger pieces, and my most recent try is a Harry Potter fan-fiction piece. Whatever, it is I’m trying to get back into the swing of it from my somewhat lengthy break.

In my last post, I had written that I was taking a break due to all the drama that had taken place within our community. Let’s admit that last year was ugly and this year it seems has been no exception to have its share of drama for the writing community. I will not go into the latest bit of drama on this post, other than to say that advanced reader copies are free!

Although, I could bring up this latest drama, I won’t for it has been kicked about and talked about quite a bit on AuthorTube.

However, with all the drama being battered about in the writing community, I have made the decision that it is not going to effect my writing or my business for that matter. I need to get back into the full swing of writing for I have missed it dearly from my life, and for a while I have been looking for that single spark to get back into what I love dearly.

I have found a few threads along the way, that I have kicked me back into it, and the greatest spark came last night, thanks to my incredibly loving boyfriend. He drew me a lovely soak bath. While I was enjoying this gift of a bath, I closed my eyes and thought about the stress that I have been facing in my life, besides not writing, and then I pushed those thoughts out of my head, and thought about my writing.

Needless to say, the clarity came to me that I need to push out whatever doubt that I may have about my stories and just write. This same advice that I have given to others, I was ignoring and that is not how I should have been conducting myself. Yes, I will admit that I was not listening to the advice that I was giving out. So now I’m going to listen to my own advice and write what I want to write and ignore what others have to say.

I have stories to tell and what goes on in the community should not interfere or bind me against my inner desires to write. Therefore, as of write now I’m holding on to the sparks that I have found and am going to write what I want. Furthermore, I have accepted that I have been letting others interfere in what I want to accomplish and that is not how I want to conduct my business. I am coming back and am engaging my craft with everything that I want it to be.

I want to grow as a write. I want my craft to grow with every story that I write. I want to pursue my passion like never before. Finally, I don’t want to go without a day of not writing. Granted, this is where I will also hold myself accountable, that during my break even though, I was not writing I was still thinking about writing. Yes, writing was still driving me and due to that drive, I could not ignore the simple fact that I needed to write. Therefore, I am back doing what I love, and I have really missed it dearly.

Even though, I am getting back to writing, there is one thing I am not partaking in Camp NaNoWriMo for the month of July. I am going to be taking it slowly to get back to into the swing of things, but I am coming back. This does not mean that any of my previous projects are dead in the water, it just means that I will also be taking another piece of advice and that is to be working on one project a time, and with that also in mind, seeing that project through until it is completed. No more leaving it on the shelf not to be touched for months.

Yes, I am some improving to do but that is all in part the growing stage of working on my craft and my passion, and I have to thank my boyfriend of helping me see that I needed a good soaking, warm bath. It just shows that sometimes that when you get a nice gesture, it comes to show that some incredible things can come from a gift; even, if it comes from somewhere unexpected.

I hope that you have found this post to be entertaining if not informative. Thank you, for being patient with me during my break. I hope that you all have a wonderful writing day! Happy Writing and Happy Creating until next time!

 

Checking back in…

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Hello once again! If you have noticed I took a bit of a break. Actually you might call it I was an extended leave. I know that it looks poorly on my business and my writing. However, I will explain what has been going on with me and why I took the break.

I will start this conversation off by stating for the record, that all of my plans for this year went out the window. That’s write, all of my goals that I had setup for myself this year and my writing have not actually taken place. Yes, you can shun me for this but on the other hand, I have been taking care of myself for once.

Needless to say, that as writers we need to not only take care of our craft but we also need to take care of ourselves in the perspective of mind, body and soul. When it comes right down to it, I wasn’t doing that in the past, for I was more focused on writing and in away not taking care of myself, my creative process and my writing was suffering for it. But it was also hard to take care of my creative process, when part of our community has been hurting others in the community that have been doing the right things.

What has been taking place in our community was another reason why I needed to take a break as well. Sorry, the negativity that has been going on was just enough for me to say that I needed to take a step back and focus on my life away from writing. This is not to say that I’m giving up on writing. Hell no, it just means that I needed to take a step back and ask myself is focusing on the negativity helping me or my audience and the answer is no. Therefore, I need to step back and look at the world of writing from two different angles.

There is the angle of the negativity and the angle of wanting to help those within our community. I enjoy the fact that I want to help others but when that gets impacted by the negativity that is taking place then it really doesn’t seem that I am helping those that want to get into our community. Let alone me.

Yes, I wanted to give my input into the various situations that our community is currently facing, but at the end of the day when the drama is becoming the fecal point of my message that I’m putting out there then the scale is tilted towards the negative and not so much towards the positive.

Therefore, I want to change that. I want to focus more on the positive than the negative. Furthermore, get back to what I enjoy most about what we do and that is to write, create and above all let me mind feel the freedom once again that comes from exploring our world that is writing.

So here is where I’m confessing my cardinal sin, yes, while I have been on this break, I have done some writing but not a lot of writing. I mean I have not sat in front of my computer on a daily basis writing. There are times when I didn’t write for weeks at a time. One of the main reasons, is life is getting in the way. Yes, I’m still working on the balance between life and writing. But every once in a while, I would take out a sheet of paper and I would write. It wasn’t great writing but it was writing nonetheless.

Yes, there are projects that I still want to work on, focus on and finish. I’m just not doing that right now. Granted, I still need to work on one project at a time and call it good when the draft is totally finished. Yes, this is still a conquest for me, which one day I hope to rectify. However, I’m not there yet as I’m still trying to find a way to justify to myself why one project is bigger than another.

I know that you are now asking yourself to me, “If you haven’t been writing, then what have you been doing?”

The answer is simple, living. I know that sounds very obscured and truth be told I’m not finding that it is not enough without writing. Yes, I’m still working crazy hours, which doesn’t help at times. However, on the other hand, this year so far, as given me so much to be thankful for. One of those blessings is that I’m in a relationship with a really great guy. Yes, I have a boyfriend and I am thankful everyday that he is in my life, in my world and above all that he is with me and I am with him.

Let me preface this part of the conversation with, if you had asked me on year ago would I be with a great guy, I would have answered no. Granted, I have known him over a year now but our relationship started at the beginning of this year, and everything about it has been wonderful. I’m happy to say that I’m with someone who loves me for me and not wanting to be with me just for the sake of using me as a means to an end. This relationship is healthy, beyond words and it is one the reasons that I can say that I’m back.

The relationship that I have, is one of the biggest reasons why I’m not wanting to focus on the negativity, and wanting to look at the positives that we can see when it comes to writing.

I can honestly sit here and say that I have missed writing, and I have missed posting about writing, working on my craft, and looking at videos on YouTube about writing. Yes, I want to do things differently this time around, but on the other hand. There are also things that I don’t want to do differently as well. There’s a balance that I need to find and I feel that we all need to find it rather we are blogging, learning or just writing in general. Everything has a balance and for a while my balance that I had going on here was really off the scale, like one dish was up higher than another.

Yes, I talk about finding the balance a lot but the reason for it is when we are in perfect balance things can go right for us, but when we are unbalanced then things tend to be off sync. When we are off sync we don’t focus as well as we should or we don’t use our best judgement. Right now, without writing my off balance and that’s even with my relationship. Therefore, I want to merge the balances that are my life and my writing into one. I want them to be balanced, which also means making or finding the time to write given the craziness that is my working life.

However, even with trying to find the balance I’m in a good space in my life. I’m happy. I’m in love. I’m finding more of the confidence that has been missing from my life. But all in all, I’m good. But I do have to admit that I have missed my blogging time and I have missed interacting with my readers online. But I needed a break. Yes, we are supposed to admit that we were bad for taking a break but in this instance I’m not sorry, that I took the break. It was very much needed among other things. But I’m back this time and am working on finding the clarity that leads more towards the positive and not so much towards the negative.

Therefore, with that in mind, there are topics that I want to cover and to share with all of you again. I will make some amends for leaving, but in other ways I’m not this time. It was needed to give me focus and to look at all the amazing things that I have going on in my life, as well as what was missing from my life.

On that note, I will end this post. I hope that you all have an enjoyable writing day! Happy writing and happy creating!